A small person in a big world: Tips on making new friends and moving on from being shy

Im not very well known. I don’t wish to be famous but I do wish for people to notice me. Ive always been a very quiet person and I spent my last few years of school trying really hard to be invisible, and being the quiet and pretty much already invisible person that I am, I achieved it well. But now that I’m out of that school and away from those people I want to have a fresh start.

I know I’m not alone on this so I thought I would share my experiences and knowledge of the subject, so here we go…

Tips on moving on:

So you’re quiet, shy, awkward, whatever else you would describe yourself as (without being too harsh on yourself, always remember to love yourself:)) and this is perhaps due to something that happened in the past or maybe you’ve just always been like this (I relate to both) and now it’s time to move on, grow, and become confident. Better said than done, I know, but it can and will happen if you really want it to.

Tip number one:
Take up a new hobby/do some volunteering/get a part time job. Doing either of these will force you to meet new people and giving them your best first impression allows them to see the side of you that you want everyone to see and know, they won’t have a clue that you’re known as the “quiet one”. I can relate really well to this one. At college before I went for my frst university interview I had a mock interview with a career’s adviser and one of the questions she asked me was “how would your peers describe you in one word?”. Okay, first of all, what kind of question is that? And second of all, my “peers” don’t even know me cause I’m a tiny little mouse that says about the equivalent of one sentence a day, so of course there’s only one word they could choose to describe me, “quiet”. And that’s what I said! After the interview she gave me feedback and on that particular question she said “maybe think of a different word, quiet can be seen as a negative, and I didn’t actually think you seemed quiet at all, you came across quite confident”. I mean, wow. I was shocked like what just happened?? So yeah what I’m saying is (getting back to the point) this career’s advisor lady had never met me before and her first impression of me was really positive and took me by surprise, so if you try really hard to give a great first impression, even if its just to a sports or dance class or whatever, it will make a huge difference and I guarantee you will enjoy yourself so much more and get on with people and if youre confident enough to make the first move which is something I always found terrifying, but I believe in you, we can do it together!

Tip number two:
Social Media!
Gaining followers on any social media doesnt happen just like that, you need to be active, following similar accounts big and small, posting new tweets/photos/statuses/content often, replying to others, commenting on posts, just being interactive, and the amazing thing about the Internet is that its a lot easier to not be awkward and to just talk to people in general. Obviously, be careful who you talk to, don’t meet anyone irl who you met online until you’ve chatted on skype and have a friend or responsible adult with you when you meet, and all that (seriously though, be safe guys). And if something does go wrong and you have an awkward situation occur, you can just block them, plus you don’t have to worry about awkwardly bumping into each other on the street, bonus!
I have actually made friends on the Internet before (who of which I’m not friends with now) but I’ve also recently made friends online through Twitter. Twitter is great for connecting with people. If you’re a blogger, vlogger or part of any fandoms you will find people similar to you on Twitter in no time. Talking to people online can be difficult to start off with so I would recommend favouriting/retweeting people’s tweets who seem cool and reply to their tweets to show them that you’re cool too! For bloggers, blogger chats are amazing ways of talking to new people who all already have one thing in common with you. Some chats that are really good include GRLPOWR chat, The Girl Gang, and Bloggers Tribe. Also joining group chats gets you instantly talking to people that are similar to you and is a great way to make new friends.

Tip number three:
Dealing with the same people at school/college/university/work when you want to move on
This is probably the hardest thing to do – trying to move on surrounded by people you’ve known for years (or maybe not?) What ever your situation is, if youre trying to start out fresh, being surrounded by people you know, even just a little bit, and who have already decided on their judgements of you is not gonna make it easy. The way to do it is to not care what they think. Now I have spent quite a few years practicing this and still find it extremely difficult sometimes to this day, however I am a lot better than I was a few years ago so it can happen, you can stop caring about what people think of you, but it will take time and a lot of determination. Something that has had a huge influence on me in this area is YouTubers. I spend a lot of my time watching YouTube and the people I watch are very positive, uplifting, optimistic and they encourage their viewers to be happy, live life to the fullest and be yourself, not be ashamed of who you are and not care about what other people might think of you, because nobody’s opinion matters. Listening to these people speak so passionately about self love and acceptance had an impact on me that I would hear their voices and their words speaking to me (kind of a bit weird) making me feel good about myself and like I can do whatever I want, look however I want and be 100% me without being afraid of what  people might think. So getting back to the point, don’t worry about what people around you might think of you acting a bit different to usual and speaking up a bit more, because to be honest, they’re either not going to notice, or they’ll be happy for you coming out of your shell a bit and might be interested in you and becoming your friend. Telling yourself things that inspire you whenver you’re worried about what people are thinking will help a lot, especially if you picture someone close to you saying it, it then feels more personal.

Thanks guys, talk again soon!

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